22. The Beginning
11:16 am, Sat, 25 May
While not hungry, the omelet...or something, is making me feel a lot better. The weight of despair and anxiousness seems to have lifted. I replay in my mind my experience. He is the Christ, the son of the living God, I just know it. Beyond any doubt.
I reach into my pocket for the name stone, that incredible name that has directed my journey but I can't find it. Hurriedly I search my other pockets. Nothing. I couldn't of dropped it, I had it as I was standing there with Jesus. I look around where I am sitting, in case it dropped to the floor. Then I realize, the name, the journey, the path are within me. What is unseen is eternal." I stop searching. What can be more eternal than the very name of God. It's not just a stone - it's a name. It's not just a nice rock - it's a certain route. It lives within me, the power of the name. A gift beyond words. A gift unending.
Just then my phone rings, but I don't recognize the number. Maybe it's Dr Aldridge telling me about Dana. I answer it quickly. "Hi, Malo here," I say.
"Hello Mr. Bel," the lady on the other side says, "It's Pat here."
My mind races to try and figure out who Pat is. I'd been expecting the hospital, but this doesn't sound like them. Who else would be calling me on a Saturday morning.
"Pat...aah...sorry," I stumble, "Pat who?"
"Pat Livet from CJ Properties."
"Oh! Pat," I reply, now recalling that she was the one who I dealt with to buy the barn for Dana. "Sorry my mind has been a bit distracted with things. So how can I help you?" I ask.
"Mr. Bel, unfortunately I have some bad news," she says. "Another buyer has apparently put in a higher offer on the property."
"Wow, that’s surprising after so long. But can't we just put in a higher offer?" I ask.
"I did of course look into that," she replies. "However the new buyer has offered the seller his asking price which is considerably higher than your current offer. You would need to offer more than the asking price if you still want the property. Would you like to do that?" she asks.
"No, you are right," I reply. "Our offer was at the edge of what we could afford. Thanks for trying."
"You're welcome Mr. Bel. I'm really sorry this did not work out. It's amazing especially considering the property has been on the market for six months without a single offer. And now two within a week. That’s just how life is I suppose. It just sometimes doesn’t work out. All the best Mr. Bel," she says as she hangs up.
I put the phone down, still thinking about the conversation. Dana's dream has just vanished. It was to be such a good project, such an important vision. I'd even seen her vision in her drawing of the barn. I feel the disappointment start to rise in me, yet strangely it is suddenly replaced by an incredible sense of peace. Maybe what Dana was seeing in her vision, was not what she would do to the barn, but what someone far greater would do with it. Her barn is gone but her vision is sure.
Peace. It fills every fiber of me.
Peace, indescribable.
I smile at the waitress as she comes to collect my plate. For the first time I look to see her name. It's Salome.
"Hi Salome," I say. She looks up startled that I've greeted her with her name. Obviously I'm not the only self-centered customer she serves. "Thanks for that great omelet, it really hit the spot," I say. "And of course served with your free smile on the side, it was just fantastic!"
Her face immediately lights up again as her smile returns.
"You're very welcome," she says as she takes the plates. "Enjoy your day."
"You too," I reply. "I pray it will continue to be a day of miracles for all of us." I see a look of hope light her eyes.
I reach into my pocket for the name stone, that incredible name that has directed my journey but I can't find it. Hurriedly I search my other pockets. Nothing. I couldn't of dropped it, I had it as I was standing there with Jesus. I look around where I am sitting, in case it dropped to the floor. Then I realize, the name, the journey, the path are within me. What is unseen is eternal." I stop searching. What can be more eternal than the very name of God. It's not just a stone - it's a name. It's not just a nice rock - it's a certain route. It lives within me, the power of the name. A gift beyond words. A gift unending.
Just then my phone rings, but I don't recognize the number. Maybe it's Dr Aldridge telling me about Dana. I answer it quickly. "Hi, Malo here," I say.
"Hello Mr. Bel," the lady on the other side says, "It's Pat here."
My mind races to try and figure out who Pat is. I'd been expecting the hospital, but this doesn't sound like them. Who else would be calling me on a Saturday morning.
"Pat...aah...sorry," I stumble, "Pat who?"
"Pat Livet from CJ Properties."
"Oh! Pat," I reply, now recalling that she was the one who I dealt with to buy the barn for Dana. "Sorry my mind has been a bit distracted with things. So how can I help you?" I ask.
"Mr. Bel, unfortunately I have some bad news," she says. "Another buyer has apparently put in a higher offer on the property."
"Wow, that’s surprising after so long. But can't we just put in a higher offer?" I ask.
"I did of course look into that," she replies. "However the new buyer has offered the seller his asking price which is considerably higher than your current offer. You would need to offer more than the asking price if you still want the property. Would you like to do that?" she asks.
"No, you are right," I reply. "Our offer was at the edge of what we could afford. Thanks for trying."
"You're welcome Mr. Bel. I'm really sorry this did not work out. It's amazing especially considering the property has been on the market for six months without a single offer. And now two within a week. That’s just how life is I suppose. It just sometimes doesn’t work out. All the best Mr. Bel," she says as she hangs up.
I put the phone down, still thinking about the conversation. Dana's dream has just vanished. It was to be such a good project, such an important vision. I'd even seen her vision in her drawing of the barn. I feel the disappointment start to rise in me, yet strangely it is suddenly replaced by an incredible sense of peace. Maybe what Dana was seeing in her vision, was not what she would do to the barn, but what someone far greater would do with it. Her barn is gone but her vision is sure.
Peace. It fills every fiber of me.
Peace, indescribable.
I smile at the waitress as she comes to collect my plate. For the first time I look to see her name. It's Salome.
"Hi Salome," I say. She looks up startled that I've greeted her with her name. Obviously I'm not the only self-centered customer she serves. "Thanks for that great omelet, it really hit the spot," I say. "And of course served with your free smile on the side, it was just fantastic!"
Her face immediately lights up again as her smile returns.
"You're very welcome," she says as she takes the plates. "Enjoy your day."
"You too," I reply. "I pray it will continue to be a day of miracles for all of us." I see a look of hope light her eyes.
11:29 am, Sat, 25 May
The hospital hasn't called but I decide to head back anyway. Dana must be coming out of post-op recovery about now. As I walk out of the door of Kairos' Café I nearly bump into two people coming in. They are walking so fast, and the one is talking so much, that they do not seem to be aware of anything.
"Now that the sale is done I want the contractors there on Monday. I want that stupid barn ripped down so I can build a bigger structure to store my cars. I should have bought that property next to mine ages ago."
In surprise I realize it is Mr. Dewati followed by one of his hurrying, note-taking slaves. He's the one who bought our barn! I feel my anger rising. He took our barn! The final insult.
"Watch out, you idiot!" he shouts as he pulls up short of walking right into me. I see a moment of confusion then recognition sweep over his face. Yet in that same moment an unbelievable sense of joy floods through me. It's as though a thousand children laughing and skipping are trapped within me.
Before he can respond, on some crazy almost out of my control urge, I step forward and hug him and say, "Mr. Dewati. Thank you for everything you've made possible for me. It's been incredible. I pray you too will find what you really seek."
With that I step away and proceed to cross the busy street to reach the hospital. Mr. Dewati is standing stunned, a look of total incomprehension etched on his face. I see children laughing and skipping, chased by playful animals, as they run on a carpet of green grass in a swirl of color and sound. Joy. Indescribable.
"Now that the sale is done I want the contractors there on Monday. I want that stupid barn ripped down so I can build a bigger structure to store my cars. I should have bought that property next to mine ages ago."
In surprise I realize it is Mr. Dewati followed by one of his hurrying, note-taking slaves. He's the one who bought our barn! I feel my anger rising. He took our barn! The final insult.
"Watch out, you idiot!" he shouts as he pulls up short of walking right into me. I see a moment of confusion then recognition sweep over his face. Yet in that same moment an unbelievable sense of joy floods through me. It's as though a thousand children laughing and skipping are trapped within me.
Before he can respond, on some crazy almost out of my control urge, I step forward and hug him and say, "Mr. Dewati. Thank you for everything you've made possible for me. It's been incredible. I pray you too will find what you really seek."
With that I step away and proceed to cross the busy street to reach the hospital. Mr. Dewati is standing stunned, a look of total incomprehension etched on his face. I see children laughing and skipping, chased by playful animals, as they run on a carpet of green grass in a swirl of color and sound. Joy. Indescribable.
11:52 am, Sat, 25 May
"You should be able to see her at 1pm," the nurse says. "I can't say any more than that at the moment. Doctor will speak to you then."
"Why is it taking so long?" I ask before she escapes back behind the no-entry door. "Sorry, Mr. Bel, I can't really answer that. Doctor will be able to answer that soon." With that she disappears back into the post-op area.
I sigh. Stress and worry flow out of me like a river. I breathe in deeply, and once more a sense of incredible peace and joy and patience floods through me. "Lord," I say, "your gift is beyond price. Thank you."
"Why is it taking so long?" I ask before she escapes back behind the no-entry door. "Sorry, Mr. Bel, I can't really answer that. Doctor will be able to answer that soon." With that she disappears back into the post-op area.
I sigh. Stress and worry flow out of me like a river. I breathe in deeply, and once more a sense of incredible peace and joy and patience floods through me. "Lord," I say, "your gift is beyond price. Thank you."
12:00 pm, Sat, 25 May
I'm standing in a passage. There are two doors. The one says "ICU", the other says "Delivery Room - No entry".
The doors swing open.
A dad runs out. He's crying. "I can't do this. I can't watch it happen again."
I hear the doctor say, "No time." He leans over and breaths into the baby's small mouth and nose.
The doors close. Moments pass.
A cry, a small cry. Someone says, "She's OK. She's OK.
The dad is crying. He hasn't heard, he's too overwhelmed.
I walk up to him and place my arm around him. "Don't worry," I say, "your beautiful little daughter Odelia has arrived. She is safe. Praise God."
He looks at me in surprise and then with a glimmer of a smile spins around and races back into the delivery ward behind me.
I'm left facing a door that says "ICU". Something compels me to open the door, to go in.
Two beds are in the room. The one is empty the other has a patient attached to a life support system. A mass of tubes and cables seem to attach the patient to machines that hiss and beep as they work. I'm drawn closer. I look down and shock floods through me. Lying in the bed is Randle.
My mind is a blur. Confusion. Randle? What? I glance around but I can't see any nurses. My hatred starts to rise. Did he get what he deserved? Did he do some crazy thing, thinking about himself. My anger wants to be fed. Randle, the betrayer. Randle, the…but all of a sudden a sense of all consuming love overwhelms me. “Randle, my friend, my friend!”
Love. Indescribable.
Then I notice it lying next to his bed. An envelope with a single word written on it – ‘Malo’.
I pick up the letter and with quivering hands open it as I slump down into a chair.
"Hey Malo,” the letter begins, “Sorry I had to resort to a letter but I just couldn't get to speak to you. Understandably you did not want to speak to me. I wouldn’t want to speak to me either, but that’s kinda difficult ;-) Anyway, I could make a whole lot of excuses and explain what happened, but at the end of it all I'm just a backstabbing Judas."
I feel a pang of regret as he uses my moniker for him. I continue reading.
"I was blinded by the money and when I realized what had happened it was all too late. They wouldn't listen to me no matter what I offered them. They said there would be a place for you. They said we would work together even though they were not continuing our original business. They said…Oh well, what does it matter what they said. I'm sorry Malo, please forgive me. I know I can never repay what I've done. Broken a beautiful friendship. I really am sorry. I hope my small token will show how much I really love you both.
- Your friend, always
Randle"
Forgive? Forgive what? I've been given more than I will ever be asked to forgive. I've been forgiven more than Randle or anyone else could ask to be forgiven.
"Forgive you Randle? What's to forgive," I say to his sleeping form as the machines sigh their rhythm of his life.
In…Out…
In…Out…
In…
"I am sorry for being so loveless, so hate-filled, so unforgiving. Please," I say as warm tears run down my face and drop on the open letter, "Forgive me. Forgive me. I love you my friend. I truly do."
…Out…
Just then an alarm sounds and nurses come rushing into the room. "Please leave immediately," they shout.
I stand before a door that says "ICU". Inside I hear a hive of activity.
"Step back. All clear." And then a loud thumping sound. The alarm continues to sound.
Moments later.
"Step back. All clear." And then a loud thumping sound. The alarm continues to scream.
The doors swing open.
A dad runs out. He's crying. "I can't do this. I can't watch it happen again."
I hear the doctor say, "No time." He leans over and breaths into the baby's small mouth and nose.
The doors close. Moments pass.
A cry, a small cry. Someone says, "She's OK. She's OK.
The dad is crying. He hasn't heard, he's too overwhelmed.
I walk up to him and place my arm around him. "Don't worry," I say, "your beautiful little daughter Odelia has arrived. She is safe. Praise God."
He looks at me in surprise and then with a glimmer of a smile spins around and races back into the delivery ward behind me.
I'm left facing a door that says "ICU". Something compels me to open the door, to go in.
Two beds are in the room. The one is empty the other has a patient attached to a life support system. A mass of tubes and cables seem to attach the patient to machines that hiss and beep as they work. I'm drawn closer. I look down and shock floods through me. Lying in the bed is Randle.
My mind is a blur. Confusion. Randle? What? I glance around but I can't see any nurses. My hatred starts to rise. Did he get what he deserved? Did he do some crazy thing, thinking about himself. My anger wants to be fed. Randle, the betrayer. Randle, the…but all of a sudden a sense of all consuming love overwhelms me. “Randle, my friend, my friend!”
Love. Indescribable.
Then I notice it lying next to his bed. An envelope with a single word written on it – ‘Malo’.
I pick up the letter and with quivering hands open it as I slump down into a chair.
"Hey Malo,” the letter begins, “Sorry I had to resort to a letter but I just couldn't get to speak to you. Understandably you did not want to speak to me. I wouldn’t want to speak to me either, but that’s kinda difficult ;-) Anyway, I could make a whole lot of excuses and explain what happened, but at the end of it all I'm just a backstabbing Judas."
I feel a pang of regret as he uses my moniker for him. I continue reading.
"I was blinded by the money and when I realized what had happened it was all too late. They wouldn't listen to me no matter what I offered them. They said there would be a place for you. They said we would work together even though they were not continuing our original business. They said…Oh well, what does it matter what they said. I'm sorry Malo, please forgive me. I know I can never repay what I've done. Broken a beautiful friendship. I really am sorry. I hope my small token will show how much I really love you both.
- Your friend, always
Randle"
Forgive? Forgive what? I've been given more than I will ever be asked to forgive. I've been forgiven more than Randle or anyone else could ask to be forgiven.
"Forgive you Randle? What's to forgive," I say to his sleeping form as the machines sigh their rhythm of his life.
In…Out…
In…Out…
In…
"I am sorry for being so loveless, so hate-filled, so unforgiving. Please," I say as warm tears run down my face and drop on the open letter, "Forgive me. Forgive me. I love you my friend. I truly do."
…Out…
Just then an alarm sounds and nurses come rushing into the room. "Please leave immediately," they shout.
I stand before a door that says "ICU". Inside I hear a hive of activity.
"Step back. All clear." And then a loud thumping sound. The alarm continues to sound.
Moments later.
"Step back. All clear." And then a loud thumping sound. The alarm continues to scream.
12:31 pm, Sat, 25 May
"He's gone," someone says.
The door opens and a nurse is standing there. Tears stream down my face.
“Randle. Oh Randle, my friend.”
She's speaking to me, "I'm sorry sir, we did all we could. He just had such complications from the operation."
"What operation? He was so healthy." I ask.
"His kidney donation.”
I stand there, the tears flowing unabated down my cheeks.
Love...Our journey to God, it starts with giving.
I'm stunned at the gift!
Love. Indescribable, for one so unworthy.
The door opens and a nurse is standing there. Tears stream down my face.
“Randle. Oh Randle, my friend.”
She's speaking to me, "I'm sorry sir, we did all we could. He just had such complications from the operation."
"What operation? He was so healthy." I ask.
"His kidney donation.”
I stand there, the tears flowing unabated down my cheeks.
Love...Our journey to God, it starts with giving.
I'm stunned at the gift!
Love. Indescribable, for one so unworthy.
1:11 pm, Sat, 25 May
"Hello Malo," a soft, beautiful voice says.
My head is in my hands as I'm seated next to Dana waiting for her to wake up. Immediately it's as if a thousand children laughing and dancing explode within me. I look up and love, joy, and peace overflow me.
"Look at that beautiful orange and blue sunbird," Dana says pointing towards the window with a closed blind. I look at the closed window and then turning around in surprise, see her beaming her beautiful, radiant smile at me. She sees. She always has.
My head is in my hands as I'm seated next to Dana waiting for her to wake up. Immediately it's as if a thousand children laughing and dancing explode within me. I look up and love, joy, and peace overflow me.
"Look at that beautiful orange and blue sunbird," Dana says pointing towards the window with a closed blind. I look at the closed window and then turning around in surprise, see her beaming her beautiful, radiant smile at me. She sees. She always has.
9:37 am, Sun, 26 May
I'm sitting in an old lounge chair in the hospital family room. Dave has just finished sharing a message with us. He says, "Anyone want to share their story today?”
I stand up and turn to face the small group of people looking at me.
"Crazy! Awesome! Life-changing.
Crazy; because that is what I was.
Awesome; because of who I met.
Life-changing; because that is what Jesus does.
This my friends, is my story..."
I stand up and turn to face the small group of people looking at me.
"Crazy! Awesome! Life-changing.
Crazy; because that is what I was.
Awesome; because of who I met.
Life-changing; because that is what Jesus does.
This my friends, is my story..."